This post is probably a little too personal (this is my 3rd blog post, dammit), but it’s a strange mystery that neither I nor anyone I’ve asked can find an answer to.

For as long as I can remember, my body reacts weirdly when it comes to certain foods from certain places. When it comes to those foods, my throat itches and I have to run to a bathroom (or have a barf bag ready) and throw up. Occasionally, I’d suppress throwing up by chugging water. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. No, it’s not because I didn’t like the food. In fact, it actually happens if I like it, but there’d be something I cannot identify that’s in the food that triggers the feeling. Because of this recurring phenomenon, I avoid the food, get skeptical when trying new food, anticipate throwing up when I actually eat new food (I sometimes feel like I’m manifesting the feeling in my throat when it actually doesn’t happen and I worried for nothing), and I look picky as a result. However, it doesn’t mean that all of a single food will inevitably make me feel sick. To show that there is no consistent reason or cause of the feeling, I’ll give almost every example I can remember of things I got sick over. This is gonna be a very long list.

• A Charleston Chew made me throw up so hard my jaw hurted, but a regular Hershey’s bar is just fine.
• On New Years Eve 2024, I ate some garlic bread at BJ’s and threw up, but store-bought garlic bread and Olive Garden breadsticks are good (Happy New Year, amirite fellas?).
• Most ice cream shops cause the feeling, but store-bought ice cream and a nice ice cream shop called Handel’s was all good. If you ever go, PLEASE try the Frosted Animal Cookie flavor.
• Little me ate some frozen macarons from Trader Joe’s straight out of the box in the car when being driven home and I threw up. At Rainforest Cafe, I tried my mom’s Pastalaya (I like spicy noodles thanks to the popular Buldak noodles) and threw up.
• At the Cheesecake Factory, my cousins, uncle, and aunt were there and I impulsively ate something (I forgot what it was) just to not look picky and it happened. They weren’t even pressuring me. I was pressuring myself.
• I tried Dairy Queen chicken fingers with honey mustard and it was the honey mustard that made me throw up while the chicken fingers were just fine.
• I ate a salt water taffy (cupcake flavored, which I actually wanted to try) and threw up, but regular old Laffy Taffy was all fine. Are they even the same thing?

There’s one time where I was mad that I threw up because I really wanted to try it. There’s a place called Two Hands, where they make Korean-styled corn dogs. Because of those mouthwatering videos of people making those Korean corn dogs YouTube, I wanted to try some as well. The crunch and texture of the bread crumbs AND cheesy goodness? Right up my alley. So, I got the spicy corndog (where instead of bread crumbs, they cover the dog with Hot Cheetos, which sounds way more awesome than regular bread crumbs) with all mozzarella filling (because I am a stupid picky pleb when it comes to sausages) and ate it... and it ended up in sadness. Because I now lost my meal, I instead ate Panda Express orange chicken and chow mein (it was at a mall and it was one of the only other things I could eat). It was concluded that it may have been the sauce drizzled onto the dog, so next time, I tried again. I ordered it again, but this time, without sauce... it ended up the same way. It was then concluded that it may have been the coating meant for the bread crumbs to stick on, but I’m not sure about that. Because I lost my meal AGAIN, I ate Panda Express AGAIN because, while I was at a different mall, the two happened to be at the food court AGAIN. I did find this recipe for Korean corn dogs and when I make it, I hope I don’t throw up like I did the last two times.

However, the one food that I always avoid no matter what is cake. I can’t recall if I’ve actually thrown up over cake, but I feel like I have. Birthday cakes, which are always from other people, are eaten by everyone except me. The only thing I do eat from the cake? Frosting (and if there’s strawberries, that too). But even that isn’t safe. Most cake frosting makes me feel sick too. The only good frosting? Plain old store-bought frosting tubs meant for decorating homemade cakes, which I eat alone with a spoon (the Pillsbury ones are the best). But how can I truly have a birthday meal at all? Substitutes. My personal favorites are Jollibee spaghetti and pizza. I really am a picky eater.

If you’re wondering, no, it is not allergies, gluten intolerance (I’ve eaten a lot of food with gluten in them), or diabetes. My throat doesn’t swell up, I don’t get rashes, and nothing too wild happens (besides throwing up). I asked my mom who’s been witnessing this phenomenon for years and she doesn’t know. I’ve asked doctors and they don’t know either. In fact, It’s rather embarrassing that during doctor’s appointments and when asked about food, I am too embarrassed to list my strange (and unhealthy) eating habits, so my mom lists them off for me and always says that she can count them in a single hand (that’s technically not true. I can eat way more than 5 or 10 foods). Trying to find answers on the internet didn’t lead me anywhere. Why am I writing about this anyway? I’m not even sure if putting out this information (especially from this blog) is even necessary.

And so, I look like a fool (or even proud, depending on my mood) eating plain food or even ordering from the kids menu. “Shoutout” to the waitress at Bubba Gump who called me “carbs eater” when serving me my fries. She didn’t mean any malice and I wasn’t bothered during the moment, but I am both embarrassed and mad now.

People go wild in buffets, but I’m trying to find food I can eat and not throw up over, so I end up with a plate smaller than everyone else’s. When eating something new in front of family and I pause to process the food, they worry about me throwing up, but sometimes, it’s me trying to find out if I’m full or needing to fully digest it (because at times, I eat fast). Sometimes, my mom would get me to try things like beef or eggs by saying it’s good for me, but throwing up (and taste somewhat) is the issue. NOT me hating healthy things like a little kid.

There was the time during Thanksgiving at my cousin’s house where after we left, my mom was mad that there weren't options provided for me, but everyone else was having a feast. I think I simply ate a bare tostada shell, bare tomato cubes meant as a topping (I didn’t like them, but I didn’t throw up. I don’t think I was even supposed to eat them bare.) with hot sauce, and sourdough bread. I was fine with it because how are they supposed to know my eating habits? It’s a family gathering, after all.

If I actually dislike the taste of the food I ate, I don’t throw up, and just leave it for other people to eat. I remember wanting to try eating apples. I did, didn’t like it, and just left it for others to eat. If I try to summarize my issue in a single or few sentence(s), people would think that I didn’t like the food and that’s why I threw up, but that’s never the case.

So, what is it? A question that will never be answered for ages. Please don’t treat me like a sopping wet dog because this thing is more of a bother than suffering. I just want to know the name of this thing I experience.